Giving a piece of music to the world is like sending a child off to college. I made it, but now it has its own, independent existence. It meets people I haven't met, and travels to places I haven't been. Perhaps it also folds its own clothes and goes grocery shopping for foods I don't like. I meet it after a few years apart, and learn something new about it. As I keep getting older, it comes into its own.
Sometimes I meet people who have performed it. They have spent hours and hours practicing it, alone and together with others. They have funny stories about it, and have their own, individual perspective on it, separate from mine. These are its friends, and lovers.
Sometimes they tell me how wonderful it is, and I am a proud parent. Other times, they ask me why it is so difficult, or could I perhaps change just one thing about it. Can you change your children?
No, my music is simply imperfect. It is the journal of my existence in that moment. I can only go back to my study to make another music-child. Making children is hard. But it is also fun.
If you hear a wrong note, it is probably actually a right note that I spent a lot of time making sound a little wrong. If you still don't like it, I apologize. But please remember, it is my journal, my bio. And I am full of wrong notes.